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7 Things Your Husband Wants to Tell You

2011-07-21T22:00:00.000-07:00

7 Things Your Husband Wants to Tell You

by Denise Schipani

7 Things Your Husband Wants to Tell You

While you may not buy into the idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, when it comes to communication, men and women do express themselves in different ways. “For women, the purpose of communication is most often to relate; for men, it’s usually to share information,” says Karen Gail Lewis, EdD, relationship therapist and author of Why Don’t You Understand? So while it may seem to you that he disregards your feelings, he might be wishing like crazy you would just tell him what you want. Read on to learn seven things your husband wants to tell you in order to help bridge the communication gap.

1. A small "thank-you" makes a huge difference.

You might think, “I do plenty around here, so why do I have to say 'thank you' whenever he pitches in?” But he probably doesn't agree: “I’d cook, clean, do the dishes and laundry much more happily if my wife said ‘thank you’ more often,” says James.* Just like you, he needs appreciation and, yes, a little ego-stroking. “Studies have shown that happy couples give compliments often. Offering a simple ‘thank-you’ is an easy way to show appreciation and make him feel significant,” says Todd Creager, licensed marriage therapist and author of The Long, Hot Marriage.

2. I’m more likely to offer you concrete advice than a shoulder to cry on.

When you come home from work and start complaining to your husband about your demanding boss, to him it sounds like you’re asking for help—even if all you want is a sympathetic ear. Dave* encounters this often: “The other day my wife was venting about a problem. Every time I came up with a solution or suggestion she would interrupt and dismiss it. She thinks I’m telling her what to do, or implying that she can’t think of solutions on her own.” Know that when he gives you advice for handling that bad boss or overbearing sister-in-law, “that’s how he shows that he cares,” says Dr. Lewis. Try not to confuse his advice with criticism, but don’t be shy about telling him, “You know, I’ve tried that, too. I think what I really need now is to just vent!”

Get marriage advice from the "other woman."

3. If you want a chore done by a certain day, tell me that.

You asked him four times to fix the wobbly cabinet door to no avail, so your complaints about him not doing it seem justified. “My wife does this all the time. I know I have things on my mental to-do list that she wants me to handle, and I will! But unless she tells me it’s urgent, I’m going to get to it when I can,” says Don.* When he hears you ask for a task or chore to be done, all he’s hearing is that you want it done—not that you want it done based on a time line you've set but haven't shared with him, says Dr. Lewis. “He wishes you knew that he’d be very happy to fix whatever you want fixed, so long as you’re specific: ‘It would be great if you got that cabinet door fixed by the time my parents arrive on Sunday.’”

4. Tell me directly what’s bothering you.

Since human beings lived in caves, men have probably sat around bewildered by their mates’ fluctuating moods, wondering why she won’t just say, “I’m pissed off at you because...” instead of, “I’m fine” through clenched teeth. The thing is, he knows there’s something wrong, thanks to the exaggerated sighing and stomping around. “You may think you’re not communicating, but you are. What you feel is being transmitted,” says Creager, just not in a healthy way. The key is to express it directly––“I’m upset that you came home and went straight to the computer”––rather than being passive-aggressive.

Learn how to move past the same old fights for a happier marriage.

5. Please don’t ask me how you look in that dress.

First of all, there’s no right answer to a question like, “Do these pants make me look fat?” Then there are the times you ask his opinion even though you’ve already made up your mind: “My wife seems to ask things like ‘Should I buy that dress?’ to confirm her choice, not to get my real opinion. And if she asks me how she looks in a dress, I know well enough to say ‘I love it!’ no matter what I really think,” says Alex.* So either don’t ask at all, or be specific, advises Dr. Lewis. “Ask him, ‘Do you think these shoes match this dress?’” And definitely think before you ask things like “Does my butt look big in this skirt?” If you want a blanket “You look great to me all the time, honey!” then you’re fine as long as your husband's willing to play along. But if it’s honesty you’re after, be careful what you wish for.

6. I wish you didn’t think we had to talk all the time to be close.

You both get home from work, or finally get the kids into bed, and then you just sit there watching television. You call this togetherness? The truth is that he does, even if to you, it’s not “being together” unless you’re actively having a conversation. “The silence in the room, and just your presence, feels like closeness to a man,” says Dr. Lewis. “He doesn’t necessarily need, as you might, to be engaged in conversation in order to feel connected to you.” So every now and then, reach out and squeeze his hand, and if you want to talk, say so––but don’t assume that silence equals lack of interest.

Find out 10 things that turn men off.

7. I wish you wanted sex more.

You may be thinking that your hubby always wants sex, but what you don’t understand is that by rejecting him you’re making him wonder what he’s doing wrong. “Many men think, ‘I must not be so good at it,’” says Dr. Lewis. It’s not just about his needs; it’s also about pleasing you. “Both men and women want to feel intimate with each other, and what women need to understand is that men often derive intimacy from sex––whereas oftentimes women need intimacy in order to have sex. So talk about what you both really want, and find compromises that work for you," she adds. And if you are in the mood? Act on it! He'll not only love that you initiated it, but also appreciate feeling desired by you.

*These names have been changed.

Original article appeared on WomansDay.com.

Depress

2011-07-18T22:29:00.000-07:00

Feeling down from time to time is a normal part of life. But when emptiness and despair take hold and won't go away, it may be depression. More than just the temporary "blues," the lows of depression make it tough to function and enjoy life like you once did. Hobbies and friends don’t interest you like they used to; you’re exhausted all the time; and just getting through the day can be overwhelming. When you’re depressed, things may feel hopeless, but with help and support youcan get better. But first, you need to understand depression. Learning about depression—including its signs, symptoms, causes, and treatment—is the first step to overcoming the problem.

Are you depressed?

If you identify with several of the following signs and symptoms, and they just won’t go away, you may be suffering from clinical depression.

you can’t sleep or you sleep too much
you can’t concentrate or find that previously easy tasks are now difficult
you feel hopeless and helpless
you can’t control your negative thoughts, no matter how much you try
you have lost your appetite or you can’t stop eating
you are much more irritable, short-tempered, or aggressive than usual
you’re consuming more alcohol than normal or engaging in other reckless behavior
you have thoughts that life is not worth living (Seek help immediately if this is the case)

Common signs and symptoms of depression

Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.
Loss of interest in daily activities. No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.
Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.
Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning, or oversleeping (also known as hypersomnia).
Anger or irritability. Feeling agitated, restless, or even violent. Your tolerance level is low, your temper short, and everything and everyone gets on your nerves.
Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.
Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.
Reckless behavior. You engage in escapist behavior such as substance abuse, compulsive gambling, reckless driving, or dangerous sports.
Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions, or remembering things.
Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.

Types of depression

Depression comes in many shapes and forms. The different types of depression have unique symptoms, causes, and effects. Knowing what type of depression you have can help you manage your symptoms and get the most effective treatment.

Major depression

Major depression is characterized by the inability to enjoy life and experience pleasure. The symptoms are constant, ranging from moderate to severe. Left untreated, major depression typically lasts for about six months. Some people experience just a single depressive episode in their lifetime, but more commonly, major depression is a recurring disorder. However, there are many things you can do to support your mood and reduce the risk of recurrence.

Atypical Depression

Atypical depression is a common subtype of major depression. It features a specific symptom pattern, including a temporary mood lift in response to positive events. You may feel better after receiving good news or while out with friends. However, this boost in mood is fleeting. Other symptoms of atypical depression include weight gain, increased appetite, sleeping excessively, a heavy feeling in the arms and legs, and sensitivity to rejection. Atypical depression responds better to some therapies and medications than others, so identifying this subtype can be particularly helpful.

Dysthymia (recurrent, mild depression)

Dysthmia is a type of chronic “low-grade” depression. More days than not, you feel mildly or moderately depressed, although you may have brief periods of normal mood. The symptoms of dysthymia are not as strong as the symptoms of major depression, but they last a long time (at least two years). These chronic symptoms make it very difficult to live life to the fullest or to remember better times. Some people also experience major depressive episodes on top of dysthymia, a condition known as “double depression.” If you suffer from dysthymia, you may feel like you’ve always been depressed. Or you may think that your continuous low mood is “just the way you are.” However, dysthymia can be treated, even if your symptoms have gone unrecognized or untreated for years.

Seasonal affective disorder (SAD)

There’s a reason why so many movies and books portray rainy days and stormy weather as gloomy. Some people get depressed in the fall or winter, when overcast days are frequent and sunlight is limited. This type of depression is called seasonal affective disorder (SAD). Seasonal affective disorder is more common in northern climates and in younger people. Like depression, seasonal affective disorder is treatable. Light therapy, a treatment that involves exposure to bright artificial light, often helps relieve symptoms.

Authors: Melinda Smith, M.A., Joanna Saisan, MSW, and Jeanne Segal, Ph.D. Last updated: July 2011

Confessions: 7 reasons why women cheat****

2011-07-04T21:49:00.000-07:00

You’ve probably heard that men cheat for physical reasons, women for emotional reasons. Sure, there’s some truth to that, but when we asked real women around the country to share why they strayed from their boyfriends, we learned they had a whole host of explanations — from bad kissing to sheer revenge. Read on for the truth about why women have given in to temptation.

Reason #1: There’s no passion
“I had been with John for about three years — he was a really nice guy, and I enjoyed being with him, but there wasn’t a ton of passion. Most everyone we knew had gotten engaged, and though John would have proposed in a second, whenever he brought it up, I’d change the subject. I took a trip to Australia for work and while I was gone, I got together with a coworker to whom I’d always been insanely attracted. I had a fantastic trip, probably because for the first time in a long time I experienced that excitement I’d been missing. I broke up with John soon after I returned home and began dating the guy from the trip. Even though I’m not super-proud of my actions, things ended up for the best: after dating for a few years, the guy from the trip and I got married and we’re incredibly happy together.”
– Giselle, 30, Montvale, NJ

Reason #2: To delay a breakup
“Right before I was going to break up with my ex, Sean, he found out that he had to put his beloved dog to sleep. He was so broken up about it that I didn’t have the heart to end things, so I waited a month or so until he was in better shape. When things seemed to be better and I was ready, he lost his job, so I felt like I was back to square one! By that time I had met someone else that I really wanted to start seeing, so I went ahead and did it. I eventually ended things, never telling Sean about my extracurricular dating. I think I rationalized that I was trying to spare his feelings.”
– Stacy, 30, Lexington, KY

Reason #3: Because absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder
“My boyfriend Greg and I decided to do the long-distance thing after I was accepted to a graduate program 200 miles from where we lived. The first few months were fine, but I soon found myself becoming extremely attracted to my lab partner, Henry. What began as innocent flirting eventually wound up with us getting physical. After the program was over, I returned home to Greg. Being with him was really difficult, but I didn’t break up with him initially because I was still attracted to him, too. I visited Henry a few times and realized that he was really more of a fling, probably done out of boredom, and that Greg was the one for me. I eventually stopped communicating with Henry. I never told Greg about what happened, which occasionally makes me feel guilty, but I chalk my cheating up to being young and silly. He and I are still together, four years after my program ended.”
– Tamara, 33, Portland, OR

Reason #4: To avoid being left out in the cold
“I began dating Eric shortly after I had been dumped by Dave, my boyfriend of two years. I was devastated and Eric was definitely a rebound thing. After Eric and I had dated for five months, Dave came back and wanted to give things another shot. I still really missed him, so I began seeing him, but never ended things with Eric. I think I sort of kept Eric around for insurance purposes, just in case things didn’t end up well with Dave. Dave and I didn’t make it on round two, and after Eric discovered through mutual friends that I had been seeing him again, he ended things with me. I definitely learned my lesson about dating two guys at the same time, not to mention trying to rekindle a relationship that’s just plain over.”
– Jen, 28, Oak Park, IL

Reason #5: To make a break from a bad relationship
“When I was younger, I dated a guy named Ethan who was really critical of me. He constantly made little snide comments about my weight, how stupid I was and how clumsy I was. For whatever odd reason, I was into him, despite the fact that all of my friends and family hated him. One weekend when he was away, I met Will at a party and we completely hit it off. He was the complete opposite of Ethan — kind, sweet and generous, yet completely cool and fun, too. We hung out all weekend and it was like a light bulb went off in my head: This is how mature, relationship-worthy guys act. I kissed Will the night before he left and broke up with Ethan soon after. Will and I dated for three years and now we’re married.”
– Allison, 30, New York, NY

Reason #6: To find that missing piece
“I’m from Florida, so I adore going to the beach and boating, but my former boyfriend, Chris, a total city boy, hated it. We always argued about where we’d take trips, and he always won. About eight months into our relationship, I took a trip to Key West with my friends and we chartered a boat for the day. The captain of the boat was this totally hot, complete ‘beach guy for life’ type, and I spent the whole day flirting with him. We met him out that night and spent time alone together. I never told Chris about it after I got home and I never felt guilty; I think part of me felt like that’s what Chris got for being so stubborn! Chris and I didn’t make it, and after we broke up, I made sure any future boyfriends loved the beach!”
– Lizzie, 32, Chicago, IL

Reason #7: To give him a taste of his own medicine
“My last boyfriend was a total player before we got together. I thought I could change him but I was wrong. I always heard rumors that he was seeing other girls while we were dating, but he always denied it. One night, I got a call from a girl he had been secretly dating, and she detailed their three-month-long relationship to me and told me about another girl she had discovered he was seeing as well. I was so mad that I went out with my friends that night, dressed to kill, and spent time with the most attractive guy; I felt like it was the least he deserved! I loved seeing the look on his face when I told him about what I did and that I knew about the other girls. And then I dumped him!”
– Ashante, 25, College Park, GA

Sources: Kaplan,C. 2011Yahoo. http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.aspx?articleid=12113&TrackingID=526103&BannerID=693282 last viewed at 05 July 2011

DS final clip

2011-06-08T08:49:00.000-07:00

My Ds video!! =/

rookie work =-P

5 eligible guys who stay single

2011-05-21T13:31:00.000-07:00

Reality check: Waiting for the “right time” isn’t the solution, according to Ian Kerner, Ph.D., author of DSI: Date Scene Investigation. “This guy needs to understand that life doesn’t start when he schedules it,” Dr. Kerner points out. And it needn’t be a lonely climb to the top: rather than derail his career, a supportive mate could provide stability, encouragement and an attentive ear. And for the guy who is working to become husband material, consider this: 91 percent of women in a Match.com survey reported that they tend to fall in love with a moderately successful career person with a balanced life rather than a very successful workaholic.

The partier
For this guy, weekends in Vegas and hitting up the newest parties and clubs has too much appeal to entertain the possibility of settling down. Says self-described “committed bachelor” Sean, 30, of Brooklyn: “I go out to have a good time — mingle, dance, have fun — and not to meet someone.”

Reality check: As the Seans of the world mature, they may notice that their party-hearty peers are becoming fewer in number or that the average age of his social circle — and of his dates — remains constant as he ages. Another warning sign? More numbers in his cell phone for “friends with benefits” than those belonging to actual friends. The bottom line is, for all the fun of casual encounters and late nights out, a partier would do well to understand that a committed relationship has its own joys, too — even excitement and novelty. “These guys are adrenaline junkies, and they fear that a commitment to one person will be no fun,” says Dr. Kerner. “But really getting to know one person in a relationship can be a source of passion and adrenaline, too.”

The shy guy
It’s a fact: Meeting women requires conversation — which can be problematic for a shy guy and can stunt his relationship prospects. “I go out with the express purpose of meeting people, but I hardly ever screw up enough courage to talk to strangers,” admits Alex, 31, of Raleigh, NC. “Even if I do, I wuss out and leave before I get anywhere.”

Reality check: Rather than forcing social behavior in a high-stress situation, like at a loud nightclub, shy guys may be better off searching for potential mates who share the same affinities. “The shy guy doesn’t have to walk up to someone cold,” says Dr. Kerner. “Instead, he should put himself in situations that present opportunities for easy conversation.” Dr. Kerner suggests theater clubs, team sports or anything else with expectations for regular participation, like volunteering. Or, if you do start dating someone, suggest making it a double date or an activity date, thereby reducing the pressure of a one-on-one outing.

The too-picky guy
For all his many, many first dates, this guy is resolutely single, never having met anyone who quite fits his mold for the ideal mate. He is convinced that there is someone out there and is alternately determined to find The One or frustrated by his inability to do so. Says Andrew, 30, of Scarsdale, NY: “It’s impossible for me to compromise. I can’t settle for someone who doesn’t attract me physically, emotionally, intellectually and so on.” Compounding this inability to compromise is the belief that perfection in another personal really exists — a notion that could lend itself to fantasies of discovering love at first sight. “A guy with impossibly high standards may fall for someone, but then he’ll see this person’s flaws and imperfections and become disappointed,” says Dr. Kerner. Unfortunately, this can lead to discounting potentially great matches, as the picky guy may be unwilling to give a date with, say, a tendency to use emoticons in emails or “too short” hair a chance.

Reality check: What these guys need to accept is that no one’s perfect — and include themselves in that statement. And, in Dr. Kerner’s opinion, “There is no such thing as a soul mate,” he says. “Rather, it’s the journey of building a great relationship over time that leads to a ‘soul mate’-type of closeness.” So the next time you’re iffy about a girl, give her more of a chance before you write her off.

The none-of-the-above guy
Of course, there are guys who might not fall into (just) one of these categories, who are comfortable with themselves, outgoing and trying to meet someone to share their lives with — but for whom it just hasn’t happened yet. Guys like “chronically single” Greg, 30, of Boston, explains: “I’m ready to give my heart to someone and to do some hard work to find her, but I have yet to find that person.”

Reality check: Keeping adages such as “Love happens when you least expect it” in mind may not totally assuage feelings of “What the heck is going on here?” Suffice to say that this still-single guy is not alone — and won’t be for long if he keeps an open mind, gets active in organizations that provide opportunities to meet others and gives luck (or some effort) a chance to work. “Regardless of his circumstances, the important thing for a single guy in his 30s to do is to put himself in situations where he’s meeting women — whether it’s making time to join in activity groups, dating online or signing up for singles’ events,” says Dr. Kerner. So, single guy, keep your chin up and continue taking those leaps of faith into the dating pool. Sooner or later, you’ll find someone who sees you for the catch you truly are.

sources: yahoo, 2011, Matt
Matt Schneiderman is a writer based in New York City.

Carlsberg

2011-04-12T04:09:00.000-07:00

Thru sensitivity bring coolness
Thru sensation bring chilliness
Thru Smooth bring presence
That calls for a Carlsberg

If

2011-04-06T05:50:00.000-07:00

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

Rudyard Kipling

Japan crisis: 10 worst nuclear disasters in history

2011-03-27T05:50:00.000-07:00

Source: Google Image

As the situation at the Fukushima plant in Japan continues to deteriorate, here are details of 10 of the worst ever nuclear disasters.

By Victoria Ward 10:09AM GMT 15 Mar 2011

Chernobyl, Ukraine, 1986. The plant blew up when one of four reactors went into meltdown during an experiment. Around 200 people were seriously contaminated and 32 died within three months. More than 350,000 people were resettled. Contamination continues to be a problem and the number who will die as a result is disputed. The accident was only revealed when a giant radioactive cloud was registered moving across northern Europe. INES level seven. Our guide to the scale.

Kyshtym, Soviet Union, 1957. A cooling system failed, causing a non-nuclear explosion of dried waste. Around 10,000 people were evacuated after reports surfaced of people's skin falling off. The radiation is estimated to have directly caused the deaths of 200 people due to cancer. INES level six.

Three Mile Island, Pennsylvania, 1979. About 140,000 people were forced to evacuate their homes when equipment malfunctions, problems with the design of the reactor and human error led to a partial meltdown of a reactor core. Although it resulted in some contamination within the plant, nobody died or got injured. INES level five.

Windscale, Cumberland, 1957. The core of Britain's first nuclear reactor caught fire, releasing a cloud of radioactive material. The sale of certain produces from nearby farms were banned for a month. It was blamed for an estimated 200 cases of cancer in the UK, half of them fatal. INES level five.

Tokaimura, Japan, 1999. A batch of highly enriched uranium was wrongly operated in a precipitation tank, causing a radiation accident that killed two workers. Around 100 workers and local residents were admitted to hospital for exposure to radiation. INES level four.

Mihama, Japan, 2004. Four workers were killed and several others injured when radioactive steam leaked from a broken pipe. One of the three nuclear reactors at the plant shut down automatically.

Tsuruga, Japan, 1981. An estimated 278 people were affected by four successive leaks of radioactivity. It took 14 hours to shut down the site.

Western Siberia, 1993. An explosion at the secret Tomsk-7 plant in western Siberia released a cloud of radioactive gas. The number of casualties is unclear.

Chernobyl, Ukraine, 1995. Serious contamination was reported at Chernobyl during the removal of fuel from one of the plant's reactors. The incident was reported only after an apparent attempt to cover it up.

Tokaimura, Japan, 1997. Work at the experimental treatment was partially halted after a fire and an explosion exposed 37 people to radiation.

Worst Cities for Finding a Job in 2011

2011-03-01T19:37:00.000-08:00

No. 5 (tie): Riverside, Ca.
16 job postings per 1,000 population between October and December 2010.

No. 5 (tie): Riverside, Ca.
Photo: David Liu/iStockphoto

No. 5 (tie): Louisville, Ky.
16 job postings per 1,000 population between October and December 2010.

No. 5 Louisville, Ky.
Photo: Thinkstock

No. 4: Miami, Fla.
14 job postings per 1,000 population between October and December 2010.

No. 4 Miami, Fla.
Photo: Thinkstock

No. 2 (tie): Rochester, N.Y.
11 job postings per 1,000 population between October and December 2010.

No. 2 (tie) Rochester, N.Y.
Photo: Dean Lyettefi/iStockphoto

No. 2 (tie): Buffalo, N.Y.
11 job postings per 1,000 population between October and December 2010.

No. 2 (tie) Buffalo, N.Y.
Photo: Denis Tangney Jr./iStockphoto

No. 1: New Orleans, La.
10 job postings per 1,000 population between October and December 2010.

No. 1 New Orleans, La.
Photo: Hope Milam/iStockphoto

Slacking for days...

2010-11-16T20:15:00.001-08:00

source:google

No idea why i keep on slacking doing nothing....

few days have pasts.. things haven finish all left undone...

so lazy....

According to Urban Dictionary > To not work for long periods of time!!! OMG that true... i do nothing...... for a long times.... !!!!!!!!!!!

damn i really need to finish my last assignment ....

when can i stop slacking... do i really need to wait till Thursday (18) to start my assignment!!! OMG!!!

help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!

JenGen Mention, I am really depressed and can't find a way to pull myself out of it. I talk about it but it doesn't help, try to do the things I normally like but just don't really care about them or anything. I can't take antidepressants so I am really at a loss. Are there any secrets out there of how to pull yourself out of it? Or do you just always have to wait it out?

Shit happen to me to.. and i feel the same way... fuxck it right? when can i get out from this shit!

Space Bound

So after a year and 6 months, it's no longer me that you want

But I love you so much it hurts, never mistreated you once
I poured my heart out to you, let down my guard, swear to God
I'll blow my brains in your lap, lay here and die in your arms
Drop to my knees and I'm pleadin', I'm tryin' to stop you from leavin'
You won't even listen, so fuck it

We touch, I feel a rush, we clutch, it isn't much
But it's enough to make me wonder what's in store for us
It's lust, it's torturous, you must be a sorcerous
Cause you just, did the impossible, gained my trust
Don't play games it'll be dangerous if you fuck me over
Cause if I get burnt, I'ma show ya what it's like to hurt
Cause I've been treated like dirt befo' ya
And love is "evol", spell it backwards, I'll show ya

Nobody knows me, I'm cold, walk down this road all alone
It's no one's fault but my own, it's the path I've chosen to go
Frozen as snow, I show no emotion what'so ever, so
Don't ask me why I have no love for these mo'fuckin' hoes

Blood-suckin' succubuses, what the fuck is up with this?
I've tried in this department, but, I ain't had no luck with this
It sucks but it's exactly what I thought it would be like tryin' to start over
I've got a hole in my heart from some kind of emotional roller-coasta';
Somethin' I won't go on till you toy with my emotions, ho it's over
It's like an explosion every time I hold ya, wasn't jokin' when I told ya
You take my breath away, you're a supernova
And I'm a...

(Chorus)

I'm a space-bound rocketship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aimin' right at you
Right at you
250, 000 miles on a clear night in June
And I'm aimin' right at you
Right at you
Right at you

(Verse 2)

I'll do whatever it takes, when I'm with you, I get the shakes
My body aches when I ain't with you, I have zero strength
There's no limit on how far I would go, no boundaries, no lengths
Why do we say that until we get that person that we think's
Gonna be that one and then once we get 'em, it's never the same
You want 'em when they don't want you, soon as they do, feelin's change
It's not a contest and I ain't on no conquest for no mate
I wasn't lookin' when I stumbled onto you, musta been fate
But so much is at stake, what the fuck does it take, let's cut to the chase
'Fore the door shuts in your face, promise me if I cave in and break
And leave myself open that I won't be makin' a mistake
Cause I'm a

(Chorus)

I'm a space-bound rocketship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aimin' right at you
Right at you
250, 000 miles on a clear night in June
And I'm aimin' right at you
Right at you
Right at you

(Verse 3)

So after a year and 6 months, it's no longer me that you want
But I love you so much it hurts, never mistreated you once
I poured my heart out to you, let down my guard, swear to God
I'll blow my brains in your lap, lay here and die in your arms
Drop to my knees and I'm pleadin', I'm tryin' to stop you from leavin'
You won't even listen, so fuck it, I'm tryin' to stop you from breathin'
I put both hands on your throat, I sit on top of you, squeezin'
Til' I snap your neck like a Popsicle stick, ain't a possible reason
I can think of to let you walk up out this house and let you live
Tears stream down both of my cheeks, then I let you go and just give
And before I put that gun to my temple, I told you this

(Bridge)

And I would've did anything for you
To show you how much I adored you
But it's over now, it's too late to save our
Love
Just promise me you'll think of me
Every time you look up in the sky and see a star
Cuz I'm a

(Chorus)

I'm a space-bound rocketship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aimin' right at you
Right at you
250, 000 miles and a clear night in June
And I'm so lost without you
Without you
Without you

Im going there Soon -.-" just can't wait for it

2010-09-26T20:00:00.000-07:00

Sleeping Under the Stars

Extravagant outdoor beds

By Alison Humes

Amangiri Resort, Canyon Point, Utah

Photo: Stephen Wilkes

There's something magical about sleeping under the stars—the velvety sky overhead, the caress of cool breezes, a dazzling sunrise greeted with birdsong. But if that whole business of lying on the ground in a sleeping bag makes you want to sprint to the nearest hotel and hide under the duvet, we have a solution: nine extravagant beds that just happen to be outdoors. They're in the most extraordinary locations, too, such as on a photographer's platform in a South African game reserve, atop a 12th-century fortress in Rajasthan, or amid the mesas of southern Utah. So even if camping's not your thing, you can enjoy all the glories of nature with a hearty dose of nurture.

Amangiri Resort

Lake Powell, Canyon Point, Utah

A full moon showcases the mesas against the sky. At night the occasional coyote yips, and at dawn bighorn sheep may troop by. Welcome to Amangiri, the extravagant 600-acre resort near the Navajo Nation in Utah as it cuts in near Page, Arizona. This is one of the best places in the United States for star-gazing: The air is clear and dry, and there’s very little ambient light. If you’d like less exposure but a more focused relationship with the starry pitch above, six Amangiri suites have “Sky Terraces”—three protecting walls with the open sky above and a pool below you. With summer nights in the 60s and January nights in the mid-30s or lower, there’s appropriate bedding—from silk and wool throws to plumped down quilts. Cocoa with a shot of brandy? Coffee at 5:30 a.m.? This is Amangiri ($1,500–$3,500).

Lion Sands Private Game Reserve, South Africa

Photo: Sabi Sand

Lion Sands Private Game Reserve

Sabi and Sand Game Reserve, South Africa

Guy Aubrey Chalkley, who founded Lion Sands in 1933, used to tell his daughter when she slept out on the Chalkley Treehouse, “Never fear the roar of the lion for it is rather when you don’t that you need to be aware.” Over the past 60 years, this tree house—built as a photographer’s platform—has been reinforced and adorned with a cozy double bed, a hot-water bottle, dressing gowns, and a basin. Guests can have dinner in the tree or dine at the lodge and head out afterward. Once dropped off—with mosquito repellent, torches, lanterns, and a two-way radio—they’re on their own till morning. Chances are that during the night you will hear a lion roaring to stake his claim. This part of South Africa, bordering Kruger National Park, has a high concentration of noisy predators: Hyenas and jackals engage in chitter chatter. At sunset and sunrise birds chime in. The tree house sits on the edge of an open plain: You may be able to hear the Sabie River, about a mile away. The sun sets and evening emerges; when the moon is full, you might see its light shimmering off the elephants less than 200 feet away across the plain. They are remarkably silent under the spectacular night sky—the Southern Cross, shooting stars, satellites—which is all yours, from horizon to horizon (tree house, $254).

Blue Mountains Private Safaris, Australia

Photo: Archie Sartracom

Blue Mountains Private Safaris

Blue Mountains National Park, Australia

“You know the song? ‘Once a jolly swagman?’” asks Mark Tickner, who takes guests into the bush for Blue Mountains Private Safaris. A swagman, he says, is a nomad who sleeps in a swag. But here, the swags are padded, lined with fine cotton, and laid out on decks by the Wollondilly River, 75 miles southwest of Sydney, where the eucalyptus forests yield their oily vapor to the sun, leaving a scent and a blue haze that gives the mountains their name. After days spent hiking the sandstone escarpment and deep gullies, viewing platypuses, kangaroos, wombats, and echidnas, slip into your swag. Dingoes howl, parrots and eagles screech, rapids roar. At dawn, the kookaburra laughs (yes, sitting in the old gum tree) and grazing kangaroos thump around in the bush (doubles, $1,317).

L’Albereta, Erbusco, Lombardy, Italy

Photo: Stefano Scata

L’Albereta, Erbusco

Lombardy, Italy

Industrialist Vittorio Moretti has a theory about houses, that each should have a pensatoio at the top—a place surrounded by windows where a person can pause, contemplate nature, and refresh. So L’Albereta, his family’s Relais & Châteaux hotel in the hills of Franciacorta, between Brescia and Bergamo, has the Cabriolet Suite. Atop a tower facing Lake Iseo, you are in the clutches of Northern Italian luxury—sitting on satin, grosgrain, damask; surrounded by vineyards; fed by the great Milanese chef Gualtiero Marchesi. Feeling romantic? Press a button and the roof above the bed opens to the heavens. During the annual Perseid meteor shower (known here as the tears of San Lorenzo), the suite is particularly sought after: Legend has it that for every falling star, a wish will be granted. But the sky is beautiful anytime, and the nights can be full of the perfume of wild roses, jasmine, and gardenias (Cabriolet Suite, $617).

Loisaba Wilderness Lodge, Kenya

Photo: www.loisaba.com

Loisaba Wilderness Lodge

Nanyuki, Kenya

Loisaba, on Kenya’s Laikipia Plateau, has spurred 10 marriage proposals. “It’s all about the beds,” says owner Tom Silvester. “They are ridiculously comfortable.” You’re just off the equator, amid acacia woodland and savanna, not far from the Rift Valley, the birthplace of modern man. There are two Star Bed camps: Kiboko, by a huge water hole that attracts wildlife, and Koija, on the Ewaso Nyiro River (you can hike from one to the other). Inspired by a Mukokoteni handcart and built on an old Land Rover axle, each bed is on a large platform set about 10 feet off the ground and 100 feet apart, ensuring privacy. In the evening, the Masai and Samburu who run the camps wheel them out from under a palm-thatch roof. The air is clear 300 days a year, granting full access to the wonder of African skies (doubles, $1,190).

Adrère Amellal Desert Ecolodge, Egypt

Photo: Siwa Sustainable Development Program

Adrère Amellal Desert Ecolodge

Siwa Oasis, Egypt

Adrère Amellal, built of mud and salt crystals, sits at the foot of a flat-topped white mountain considered holy by the local people. The lodge uses no power except for the generator that runs the kitchen. Outdoor beds are set up on the roof or out in the desert, south of the Siwa Oasis. In an immense “ballroom” (a bowl between tall dunes), dinner is served at magnificent tables set with crystal and argenterie. Later, Siwan staff in turbans and tunics escort you into the desert. They don’t use flashlights; you walk up a dune in the pitch black. On the other side are real beds made of palm reeds, with proper quilts and pillows and Egyptian cotton sheets. But if you fall asleep, you’ll miss the magic of absolute silence ($800; open Sept.–July).

Killa Bhawan, Rajasthan

Photo: Chris Caldicott

Killa Bhawan

Jaisalmer, Rajasthan

In Jaisalmer, a living fortress high above the surrounding small city of the same name, a Killa Bhawan guest might follow local custom and sleep out on the roof, in a well-made colonial bed. Jaisalmer’s magic is magnified by its isolation in the middle of the Indian desert. Known as the Golden City, it was built in the twelfth century of yellow limestone marble and is famous for its palace, which you can see from the terrace, as well as its exquisite havelis (mansions) and seven Jain temples. Night brings a little wind, a clear desert sky, and the sounds of the city bedding down. Three thousand people live in the fort; in the temples, the worshippers sing and drum, then motorbikes head home, and by ten all becomes quiet. Life begins again around six with the bells of the temples and first prayers (doubles, $120–$200).

my monologues!

2010-09-22T00:14:00.000-07:00

You know what I found out? Huh? You know what I found out. That life is a... a... a... a puzzle! Life is a PUZZLE. Except there's... there's no picture on the box... no kind of direction, at all, cause... cause the pieces are all scattered and broken everywhere... and just when ya think ya got it, JUST WHEN YA THINK YA GOT IT! You don't. Cause there's always pieces missing, there's always something missing. And then it all comes tumblin' down, Your whole life just comes tumblin' down. And I miss her already. She had the most beautiful eyes. Yeah they were like hazel green or something..

Bored moment.!!!!!

2010-08-31T20:27:00.000-07:00

How hard is copy and paste!!! too bored and have nothing too do!!!!
some idiot football player!!! Keep so called insured his hair for 1 million!!!! (Troy Polamalu's)! Troy the Tunder God!! =D

How the hell he play football with that funky hair>>..!!!
and that so call hair been insured USD1million

How young generation will change the workplace !

2010-08-19T20:16:00.001-07:00

Oooo~ how hard too copy and paste... =D

There’s no doubt that young generation which we called generation Y will fundamentally change the corporate sector globally. Managing the upcoming generation (generation y) is the hot topic among consultants, Human Resource executives and talent management professionals.
We have a voice, and we have the ear of the decision makers. Not bad for a group of lazy, entitled, twenty somethings. We’ve learned the importance of balancing work and life from our overworked parents, and we’ve watched our older siblings and cousins struggle with their baby boomer bosses who refuse to retire. Now we’re primed to change the workplace for the better. Here’s how they will do it.

The new generation Y at workplace will have a voice, and the ear of the decision makers. Not bad for a group of lazy, entitled, twenty somethings. They have learned the importance of balancing work and life from our overworked parents, and they have watched their older siblings and cousins struggle with their baby boomer bosses who refuse to retire. Now they are primed to change the workplace for the better.

1-Now there will only Productive meetings

Time has changed when people wasted their hours in unproductive meetings and gained nothing, the next generation will bring the proper schedule with them, the meetings will only consists of the productive activities and last for 30-60 minutes at their max.

2-Flexible Working Hour

9:00-5:00 was the traditional working hours, now the time schedule will be change, people will not come to show that they are present, the working schedule will be flexible, people at their seats will be only avail when they are supposed to work, in their free time, they are not going to stay in the office. this will not only save a lot of workplace resources but also bring a custom of responsibility in the employees.

3- Administrative Support

The up coming generation will not going to perform the clerical jobs for them selves, the manager or even assistant manager will go for assisting staff, the time in non productive activities will not be consumed. Only critical thinking and the activities like decision making can be made by the managers.

4-Do or Die

People will believe in doing of their jobs, if they are unable to perform what they really supposed to do, they will go for quiting the job. The concept of retainment of the employee will again faded away. you work and you will get pay, you don't work, you will be get fired.

5-Compensation Packages

Remuneration packages will also change, people will go for the best of their compensation. organization will pay the employees higher for their duties in order to retaining the employees for longer period. salaries will be highly competitive, new generation needs to be pay more in order to get recruited. This financial crunch will not lasting for ever.

6-Performance Based Measures

Emotions and other parameters will soon comes to an end, there will be only performance, a sole criteria for a job. Measures on the based of performance will get sticker and sticker, the employers expectations will exceed hundred folds more than the present.

7- Future of HR personnel

HR personnel would be the highly honored individual of the organization as the employer would realize the strength of the human capital and in order to gain momentum in the workforce HR department will supposed to be work harder.

'Generation Debt' is going deep into the red!!!!

2010-08-19T20:00:00.000-07:00

copy and pasted! how hard was that...

Zoe Paul has made drastic changes to her former lifestyle. As a Web designer in San Francisco during the heady dot-com era, she started her mornings at Starbucks, bought her coworkers drinks during happy hour, and ate out nearly every night.

Now 30, Paul works without benefits for a small ad agency in the Bay Area and worries daily about being laid off. To help pay off $10,000 in credit card debt, she routinely empties coins into a jar by her bed. When furnishing her living room, a trip to a furniture store was not an option; instead, she bought a tweed sofa bed from a thrift shop for $67. She packs lunch every day. Cable is gone, so is Internet access.

The most painful trim: Abandoning her daily Starbucks run. “That’s a thing of the past. Now it’s a treat,” she said.

Serves her right, you think? Many twenty- and thirtysomethings raised on MTV and InStyle magazine have tried to mimic the glamorous lives of the rich and famous through the use of credit cards. But as the 21st century has ushered in skyrocketing housing prices, stagnant income levels and five- or six-figure student loans to pay off — a seismic shift has occurred: A growing number of young adults are reassessing their lifestyles and mimicking the frugal habits of their Depression-era grandparents.

They clip coupons, organize grocery-shopping trips to Sam's Club instead of darting to Whole Foods and now consider a $4 cappuccino as an infrequent luxury.

“Life just seems more expensive these days,” said Paul. “When I was growing up, I didn't know a lot about handling money or being frugal. Now I'm learning.''

High housing costs
With the median home price rising by 26 percent in the past five years — while young adults' income has gone up less than 10 percent — people in their twenties are playing an endless game of catch-up. Buying a home isn't even in the cards since prices in many urban areas where young people go to start their careers have more than doubled.

face problem!

2010-08-18T20:27:00.001-07:00

Deng! i wanted to update my uniSA blog and i waited so long my blog post haven load... SO CALLED FACE PROBLEM!!! and when i ask for help the page was load.. lol!

face problem!!! struggle!!! which topic!!! Young Generation Struggle in Financial or Depression which one to choose....
which 1.. depression was taken by classmate .. i wanted to be special so that my topic are fresh .... its dangerous!!!

We touch i feel like rush, we crutch it isn't much..But it's enough to make me wonder what's in store for us!!! it's lust, it's torturous..you must, be a sorcerer..cuz u just, did the impossible, gain my trust, don play game..it can be dangerous..

WHICH ONE... @...@'

err... current issues!

2010-08-15T10:19:00.001-07:00

This is week two since I started my intake at Taylors. I found out that I have few heavy subjects that I have to cook in these courses. I notice that my brain are not working properly, I was trying and trying to click out idea from my brain. I was cracking for few days. Idea still did not pop out like I expected, I keep cracking and cracking and I trying to force out idea. Things keep pop out.. such as gamble addiction, online addiction, pre marriage sex, global warning, global financial crisis, celebrity role model, corruption, sex orientation, poverty, alcohol & drugs abuse and things like that’s . I keep do few mind maps. Idea was all around me and I cannot do any decision which idea should I choose. Mind maps are all around me and I try to pick one. I been so picky because I wanted be different from others students. There are so many students taking this subject I worry my work will not able to be interested like others……

Why I choose Depression? I feel that by doing this will make my life easy? I believe that everyone been thru this. It’s just another topic that most people will do. I have look thru some clip and I notice that a lot teenagers show depression mostly on sadness and most likely involve in love story. Very people did not notice by cannot complete assignment can lead to depression like what I am trying to do now…

still thinking what to write... 1500... word to go! idea where are u!
Depression
Why I choose depression?
By doing what can lead the topic interesting?
What I can show people by doing this topic?
How I am going to this?
How people react to depression?
By doing what we can get out from depression?
Normally what type of mood we can say we fall for depression?
Depression basically brings us to sad mood?
Apathy

bored moment....

2010-04-18T04:07:00.000-07:00

He accompanies me during my happy and sad moment. He send someone to guild me when I lost…. Life is about up and down. Sometimes I feel that I have nothing else to life for and sometimes I feel that life is an exam that everyone has to face for.

He send me an angel to protect me, its help me when I face problem. Its was the happiest moment in my life. But not every time things will work so well. My God allow difficulty
Happen to everyone. its will help an individual get stronger and gain wisdom for each experience that I face.

This is the different between man and God. Man needs love and God need man to worship him. And I know that my God is very kind for me. He has been protecting me from everything that happens to me.

What is life? Bible said that life is a creation thing that God create.
I need Strength and wisdom!!!!!!!!!

What's Left Of Me

2010-03-30T12:23:00.000-07:00

I am lost. I lost everything; lose my happiness, pride, days and my desire. Depression is not a reason but I still stuck with it; everyone will have their own journey. My journey towards you had ended everything seen like a dream the moment I wakeup its just puff gone. I wanted to stay as long as possible in my dream; I don’t want to wakeup I don want to face it. all I wanted is run away from the problem that I have to face it.

What is life, life is about take and go? Some people seek towards religion, some people make their way of life and some people have to accept how hard or simple their life is.
How to describe my life… I feel that my life is like rollercoaster up and down ….. Have I seek religion for the depression I been thru... I really can’t face it. How come and why? Have I try others way’’’’’’? I drunk myself I? Have I do some extreme activities? Nothing can triumph over it. I don really get it. It’s been months and I still being like a shit/ zombie. Sometimes I realize that I am a jackass that lost in a forest by doing nothing sitting at riverside by waiting the pain flow away.

What can I say? I miss her? I love her? I wanted her so much? I need her?
Give me something to believe at so that I can move on with my life…

Haizz /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ its all about up and down………

My heart

2010-03-09T06:31:00.000-08:00

my heart is broken and its all because of you
my heart cant be put back together with some glue

my heart is full of pain and u dont even care
my heart really needs you but your not even there

my heart now as an empty space
my heart needs u to fill that place

my heart feels the friendship will never be replaced
my heart wants you to still keep me safe

my heart knew this friendship would grow into something more
my heart knew you were going to shut that door

my heart now misses all fun we have had together
my heart ...................................

this is how i feel this afternoon!

2010-02-20T01:56:00.001-08:00

They say there's no place like home, I believe that
But my home is not where last night I sat
My home is where I keep my things
My home is where my doorbell rings
My home is not where my memories lie
Where I grew up in sorrow and the years wondered by
And now it's discovered I will always be bound
It surrounds me with love like a comforting dome
Being wrapped in your arms is where I call my home
My life makes more sense, the world seems more true
I love my home and I really love you

loss

2010-02-18T00:40:00.001-08:00

You don't love me, is my destiny
You don't care, is my bad luck
You don't need me, is my loss
As never ever again you want to hold me, is again my loss
Is also the pain, of my life.
This pain I wish, I never had to feel, is again my destiny
Which is why my luck is running out.
I am failing, and gaining nothing...Except pain
Is my biggest loss.

trust

2010-02-18T00:25:00.000-08:00

To trust someone means you trust them with your life
To trust someone is based on your clarity of judgement
To trust is to believe that the person has you 100%
To trust
To trust
Who could you trust in your greatest moment in need?
Who will be worthy of having your trust?
Will you be able to confide your trust among certain people?

how lost im

2010-02-17T08:54:00.000-08:00

Months have past, my life have lost direction to move on.
everything have stop, my hope died. i have nothing else beside my shadow.
the only things that will not betray me is my shadow. i have done some mistake, i have lose my love one, my life is full of sadness and anger.i wish someone just kill me.....

i really miss you.. i wanted you so badly... i can't face it... everything i do remind me of you. i miss you so badly....

Anger

2010-02-16T18:48:00.000-08:00

Anger is deep within me
Anger is what I want to hear
Anger drives me crazy
Anger is what turns me on
Anger wants to kill me
Anger is what makes me mad
Anger inside me
Needs to stop
Where did it come from
Will it ever stop
My anger is uncontrollable
Anger lashes out at innocent victims
But, why, where, who, what
Brought me so much anger?
Everything makes more anger in me
Life full of pain
Is there ever gonna be an ending?

Woman

2010-02-13T19:54:00.001-08:00

Woman, Oh woman
Why do you make me feel
Every time I'm near you
My heads a spinning wheel

Woman, Oh woman
What have you done to me
Woman, Oh woman
Did you cast a spell on me

Woman, Oh woman
When you touch me, I chill
When you kiss me, I'm in heaven
I've known nothing so real

Woman, Oh woman
When I gaze into your eyes
I'm blinded by the passion
I feel that's deep inside

Woman, Oh woman
Did you over do your spell
My hearts in many pieces
It sadness me to tell

Woman, Oh woman
What have you done to me
Woman, Oh woman
Did you cast a spell on me

Woman, Oh woman
In sadness I do tell
My hearts in tiny pieces
Did you over do your spell

alone

2010-02-13T19:35:00.000-08:00

alone I am in the rain
wishing and wishing for it to rid my pain
alone in the darkness I couldn’t ask for more
alone as I cry these salty tears
alone dreaming about my fears
alone I am but why
why would I lay here and die
why is my being alone always the answer
why is being alone part of my disaster.
Alone I am in my fairytale dream

The darkness around me what does it mean
alone as the cold drapes over me
forever alone I choose to be.

life II

2010-02-12T07:13:00.001-08:00

Life is full of challenges
Which people do face
Life comes and goes
Just as the season changes
Life is all about time which
Which wait for no one
Life is so beautiful
Which is not appreciated by all
Life is a market place
Where people sell and buy
Life is a journey
Where people travel pass
Life is up and down
Where people struggle
Life is all about you
Life life life life
Ever existing

Memory II

2010-02-11T20:08:00.000-08:00

This love I feel is a memory
But this memory of love is loved
For it’s a truly lovely memory
Of us two, who have loved

But our love is only a memory
and memories are soon forgotten
But the love I hold for you
Will never spoil, nor rotten

It’s not the love that you remember
For that love is a memory true
The love I hold is that of a loved one
Yes, I’d say that would do

For our love is ever evolving
Be it dead and in the past
The love I have for you now
Not even time could out last

Call it the love of the first
Or the first love for sake
No matter the distance, no matter the time
A simple call you can always make

For this love I’ll always remember
Until my last breath day
The brotherly love I hold for you now
I wouldn’t have it any other way

running away

2010-02-11T19:39:00.000-08:00

I am running out things to say
I am running out of lies
I am running out trust
I am running out of Idea
I am running out of love
I am running out of hopes
I am running out of dreams
I am running out of silent screams

I am starting to get tired of running toward you
so I guess ill just start running away

Fear

2010-02-11T19:25:00.001-08:00

Fear is when you run away,
Fear is when you’re scared to love someone,
Fear is when the sky turns upside-down,
Fear is when you lose your loved ones,
Fear is a feeling of danger,
Fear is when you aren’t brave,
Fear is the feeling of anger,
Fear is when you can’t behave,
Fear is when your shy,
Fear is like not having devotion,
Fear is when you’re afraid of saying bye,
Fear is like a dark blue ocean,
Fear is like being lonely,
Fear is like not being able to reappear,
Fear is like feeling ghostly,
Fear is like a dark dungeon.

My angel

2010-02-11T19:14:00.001-08:00

My angel is the one who looks over me
My angel is the who cares for me
My angel is the one who loves me
My angel has beautiful eye
My angel has beautiful black hair
My angel will be there when I get hurt
My angel will be the one that is always on my mind
She is the angel that keeps me breathing
She is the angel of my dream
She is the angel that keeps me alive
My angel will cheer me up when I’m sad
My angel will love me for me
She is my angel of my life

Sometimes

2010-02-11T09:12:00.001-08:00

Sometimes i feel like I'm left out,
Sometimes I don't like my life,

Sometimes I feel like the world
should be different,

Sometimes I just think there's a missing piece,
Sometimes I feel like people don't like me,

Sometimes I feel like the world is after me,
but just only sometimes

Moody

2010-02-11T04:19:00.001-08:00

What is life when all you do is breath
What is life with no mission
What is life as it lies around and does nothing but explode you
What is life when you are limited against others
What is life if you cant tell what's there for you
What is life if I have no answers to these questions
What is life if you don't know the end to it
What is life after your death
What is life without rhythm
What is life with limited chances
What is life with lie

What do I mean by 'life'

A true friend

2010-02-10T20:49:00.001-08:00

A true friend
A true friend is the one who picks you up when you fall
A true friend is one that won't lie
A true friend is there when you call
A true friend is there when you want to die
A true friend knows just what to say
A true friend won't care what other people think
A true friend will help you find your way
A true friend will make sure you don't sink
A true friend will help you choose your path
A true friend will know when something is wrong
A true friend has to sometimes face your wrath
A true friend makes you feel like you belong
A true friend………………………………….

Lonely Part II

2010-02-10T20:43:00.000-08:00

Lonely, lonely me, I'm all by myself
All alone in my tiny world
Lonely, the world run without me.
Oh, lonely, lonely me; in a cruel and twisted world.
Close my eyes and drifting away
From this lonely, lonely place

Lonely

2010-02-10T20:34:00.000-08:00

Lonely I, lonely love you,
Lonely I, surrounded by nothing,
Lonely I, pieced and waiting,
Lonely I, cursed without you.

Lonely I, sit and think,
Lonely I, was before I met you,
Lonely I, hopeless still love you,
Lonely I, pain and nothing.

Lonely I, in the darkness,
Lonely I, with my tears,
Lonely I, sorrow and hate,
Lonely I, is this my fate?

Love

2010-02-10T20:27:00.000-08:00

What is it with Love
That makes me
then breaks me?

When in love
Do I truly love?

Is it really love
Or do I think that I love?

Maybe I just love being in love
Or love the idea of being in love?

I spent my whole life chasing love.
In the end the one thing I truly love
Could just be the pursuit of love.

Sorrow

2010-02-10T09:34:00.000-08:00

In my inner grove, I sowed for sorrow.
Oh, how it grew below my skies,
such marvelous sight in my eyes.
I lived for sorrow -
till it grew too large in my grove,
I wept;
and watered my sorrow with tears.
I sowed for sorrow till it lived
and grew so strong, so fine.
It lived to take away my life...
It lived and then I died.

I remember

2010-02-10T09:19:00.000-08:00

I remember when you said I love you
I remember when I said yeah me too

I remember our first kiss
I remember all the things we do

I remember when you said together...always
I remember when I stood in front of you dazzled and amazed

I remember the sparkle in your eyes and
I remember the tears you made me cry

I remember how I spend my time with you
I remember how you leave me, and I asking is there anything that I can do

I remember when I looked into your eyes and
I remember when we said our goodbyes

This is how i feel

2010-02-10T09:08:00.000-08:00

suicide, suicide in my head,
suicide, suicide i'm nearly dead,
suicide, suicide my wrists are cut,
suicide, suicide i know i'm morally unwell.

suicide, suicide still in my head,
suicide, suicide the razors red,
suicide, suicide my hands dread,
suicide, suicide i know i'm morally unwell.

suicide, suicide prevailing in my head,
suicide, suicide the beginning of life,
suicide, suicide the end of sorrow,
suicide, suicide the end of pain.

suicide, suicide in my head,
suicide, suicide c'mon pull the trigger,
suicide, suicide im dead,
suicide, suicide i know i'm morally unwell.

2010-02-10T09:05:00.000-08:00

I don't understand,
The pain of loss is too much.
Is that why I can't say sorry,
the pain of loss is too much.
I still love her
The pain of loss is too much.
She gives me pain,
the pain of loss is too much.
I sense in coming,
the pain of loss is too much.
The pain to me,
from her,
the pain of loss is just too much.

Loss

2010-02-10T08:39:00.000-08:00

I resent
What loss represents
I resent
What great loss presents

So what’s the fuss about loss?

Waiting!
Debating!
Contemplating!

What is loss?
Something you care about
Taken away from you by force
Creating total unforgivable chaos

Thinking!
Blinking!
Seeking!

What is loss
It is a minus instead of a plus
Hence the unmistakable fuss
Death and sickness build up great sorrow
Loss brings despair instead of relief
And in loss itself I have no belief

I resent
What loss represents
I resent
What great loss presents
Loss! An unfair cause

Depression!!!!!

2010-02-09T19:34:00.000-08:00

I have depression I do admit,
Admit that I have been depressed,
Thinking how much I wish I could be happy,
Thinking how much I want in life,
Thinking how much I miss someone,
When I look back I can see how much this depression has been there in my life,
I need this to be fake,
I need this not to be true,
Yet again its true I have this depression that makes me sad inside and the outside,
My depression has caused me to see how sad I can be,
How it makes me feel,
How this depression makes me think of cutting and suicide,
But we all human,
We have all have something to overcome,
I will overcome this depression once and for all,
I fight back some how,
This depression I will get rid of someday,
For now I have to deal with it.

Thanks part 2 =.="

2010-02-09T19:18:00.000-08:00

Thank you,
Thanks for looking after me
Thanks for having someone to look upto and admire
Thanks for giving me space
Thanks for giving me advice
Thanks for making me laugh
Thanks for making me sing
Thanks for making me sigh
Thanks for giving me everything you can
Thank you

Thanks for everything!!!

2010-02-09T19:00:00.001-08:00

Thanks for this and thanks for that
Thanks for the known and thanks for the unknown
Thanks for the things we called it loved
Thanks for the unloved
Thanks for the hearts small and large
Thanks thanks thanks

Even when life deals us lemons, we give thanks and make lemonade.
Even when the dark clouds appear ever so close to our person, we give thanks.
Give thanks give thanks give thanks

My Drug!

2010-02-09T18:40:00.000-08:00

Music is what makes you move
Music is what makes you sad
Music can be good or bad depending on how its used
Music can make you choose different clothes to wear
Music can make you change your hair
Music can make you choose new friends
Music can make you want to dance
Music can make you fight
Music can make everything alright
Music can take care of you when your alone
Music can make everything feel like home
Music can harm and take away
Music can make you want to stay
Music is the only friend I have
Music is what keeps me alive
When I feel like I can't survive
Music that keep me survive

Confusing

2010-02-09T10:16:00.000-08:00

Recently I was flirting with a girl. I have no idea why things like this will happen in this dark time of my life. Have no idea why I was doing this…. I scare I will drop into the deep hole and I really can’t afford to climb my self up.

My Identity

2010-02-09T09:36:00.000-08:00

So lost deep inside,
Is all that makes me.
My true identity,
Is hard to see.
To my friends and family,
I’m a different me.
I have a secret identity,
Wonder if you’ll ever see.
My thoughts and actions,
Are all that makes me,
But some things I may do,
May not describe me.
Now look inside me,
If you ever feel,
like it,
I’m no-one but me,
Never hiding my identity.
Don’t say I am Donkey,
Because I never showed you,
two of me.
Now please,
Look at me,
Try to see the real me.
I’m no-one

My meaning of love

2010-02-09T07:58:00.000-08:00

Love is unpredictable Love is uncontainable
Love is reliable Love is infallible

Love is right Love is wrong
Love is weak Love is strong

Love is good Love is pure
Love is real Love is sure

Love is jealous Love is pain
Love is lost Love is gained

Love is naked Love is raw
Love is everything Love is all

Love is here Love is there
Love is beautiful Love is fair

Love is great Love is shit
Love is demanding Love is it....

Emoing

2010-02-09T00:47:00.000-08:00

I look at a tree,
And what do i see?
My Valentine's face
smiling back at me.

I spot a cute rock,
But, Oh what a shock,
For it remind of you
And that is no crock.

Everytime i think,
Everywhere that i turn,
My feeling just burn
With thoughts about you,
My love please don't spurn!

Each rock and each tree,
Each cloud and each bee,
The earth and the sea,
It all remind me.

Life

2010-02-08T23:52:00.000-08:00

Some people might say life sucks
or life is full of shit
While other people say life is beautiful
or life is full of surprises
I must say, I agree with all those
Life is whatever you think of it..and everything you think of it
Life is what you make it of it and what you say of it.

Life is about sadness
Life is about happiness
Life is miserable
Life is about loss
Life is about smiling
Life is about crying
Life is about love
Life is depression

I could go on and on and tell you all about life
But I'm not here to sort this out for you
cuz..
Life is all about you and how you treat it
You criticizes it...well, you're actually criticizing yourself
You like it, you hate it..well, its all up to you
Life is you so be careful how you describe it

Lost

2010-02-08T23:23:00.001-08:00

Lost feeling to care

Lost sympathy to spare
Lost patience to bear
Lost sense to keep fair

Lost endurance, to follow restriction
Lost peace, to stop frustration
Lost power, to avoid attention
Lost strength, to evade aggression

Lost courage, to sacrifice
Lost kindness, to be polite
Lost temper, to keep quiet
Lost thought, to be right

Lost anger, to control
Lost opinion, to give poll
Lost desire, to keep goal
Lost myself, to have a role...

Memory

2010-02-08T21:57:00.000-08:00

You walked in to my life,
But just like that,
You walked back out,
Still you will be a memory,
A memory that I have created in my mind,
Still you will be a memory,
A memory that will always be locked,
Away in my heart and my mind,
I will always have a memory of you in my heart,
And I will always carry that picture of you in my mind,
Still you will be a memory,

Falling Away..

2010-02-08T21:39:00.000-08:00

Can you say it and mean it from the bottom of your heart?
Can you take it and never let us fall apart?
Or did you fake it all from the start?

My eyes are bleeding for I don't know the answer.
I get burned when I look but there is no drop of liquid,
I can feel deep within that there is something you're trying to conceal.

That hard layer over my heart you cannot peel.
Because I'm not going to let you get close enough to help me heal.

I don't need it that much just let the pain begin to kill.
I'm falling away forever.
I guess you won't ever be the one to stay.
We took the chance but it began to break.
I'm falling away forever with this pain.

Can you say it and mean it with all that you got?
Can you take it and let it be the last shot?
Or did you fake it and lost a lot?

My eyes cannot see the answer directly in front of me.
I don't really feel like I am your everything.
Why does every word from your lips gotta be so mean?
The salty tears drop down burning my cheeks.
I never knew that I could ever feel so weak.
Praying all night long down on bent knees.

I'm falling away forever.
I guess you won't ever be the one to stay.
We took the chance but it began to break.
I'm falling away forever with this pain.

Can you say it and mean it from the bottom of your heart?
Can you take it and never let us fall apart?
Or did you fake it all from the start?

Who Are We?

2010-02-08T20:59:00.001-08:00

We were best friends for over .....
We shared the laughter, the memories, tears

But something occurred just recently now
I wish I could tell you some place, and somehow

Even after all these ....., you couldn't get this
How would I even manage to let it leave my lips?

Friends? You act like you've been here before
But you don't even get out much anymore

You want to hang out more
But I'm pulling away

When you finally realize,
It'll be a new day

Please don't fight it
You don't remember how to be a good friend
Sometimes these things are really meant to end

When your conversations are one-sided, you don't let me speak
I feel so bad that you're holding on to this, it's making me weak

It's time that you know what I've kept for a long time
Not telling you makes me feel guilty of crime

I've wanted to tell you forever now
It aggravates me all the time, like the chewing of a cow

It's been in the back of my mind
But I can't leave it behind

so...

Just Getting Started.

2010-02-08T19:00:00.000-08:00

Lets talk about depression!

You’ve been feeling listless and low, can’t concentrate, and don’t enjoy doing anything that used to give you pleasure. You can barely keep your eyes open during the day, yet the minute your head hits the pillow at night, you are wide awake.